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Lullaby I -'Feels Like Fire'
by
Andromeda Valentine
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Pairing: Emma/Shalimar

Rating: PG-13 (It'd be G if they weren't naked. <lol>)

Status: New (04/23/03); Complete

Archive: Yes to list archives, anyone else please ask first.

Feedback: Yes, please!!

Series/Sequel: Part One of the Lullaby series...

Other Websites: Crimson Red

Disclaimers: Nope, still not mine - Mutant X belongs to Tribune, and Feels Like Fire belongs to Dido Armstrong and Carlos Santana...

Summary: "I'll never know *what* Shal's fascination with my voice is, but I can't refuse such a romantic gesture."

Notes: The song Emma sings is Feels Like Fire, by Carlos Santana and Dido, off Santana's album Shaman. Many thanks to my good pal Lil for pointing me in its direction...

And brownie points to anyone getting my little injoke...

Warnings: Femmeslash. (Duh... <lol>)

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"Sing for me, baby..."

I just smile down at her, nestled like a sleepy kitten in my arms. A very large, very naked kitten, mind you, but a kitten nonetheless.

"What do you want to hear?" I answer indulgently, smoothing back her hair. I'll never know *what* Shal's fascination with my voice is, but I can't refuse such a romantic gesture.

"Mmm... I don't know - something mellow."

I just chuckle. "What, no Aimee Allen?"

"No, no revolutions..."

Buying time to choose a song, I question her for probably the thousandth time. It's almost a ritual by now...

"What is it with you and wanting me to sing, anyway?"

"I can smell you, and I can feel you holding me; I can see you, and I can still taste you; I want to be able to hear you, too..."

Her ritual response, that, and it always makes me smile.

The simple warm familiarity of her reply calls a song to mind, one that's never failed to remind me of finally finding my place here with Mutant X, and with her...

Holding her even closer to me, I start singing.

"I'm telling you it's over -
now there's an angel
holding me,
my way's easy...

Even if you're fallen -
oh, you're struggling -
there's still beauty
in what we do..."

It feels a little sentimental to say so, but she really *is* my guardian angel - I couldn't even count the number of times she's saved me, from evil New Mutants and from myself.

She claims that I save her, too, by keeping her eyes on our mission and by bringing out her better instincts, but I'm not entirely convinced that's a fair trade.

"So que sera,
let's go sailing on...
There's a wise man
in every fool...

I say come back -
come in from the cold,
into the warm.
I feel like fire,
guiding you back home
as darkness falls..."

She's purring now as I sing, and I let her feelings of contentment wash over me.

I've never know the sort of simple acceptance I've found here - my own parents couldn't handle my gifts - and I've certainly never known the sort of warm, ever-present love that radiates from Shal whenever she's near me.

"So everyone stands in line,
'cause they wanna stay alive,
to wait alone,
no dog, no bone...

And then you find it's over -
still, it tears your heart
to slip away
from the crowd..."

Thankfully, I'll never know what would have become of me without Mutant X, though it's a good guess that I'd probably have spent my life bitter and alone, squandering my gifts working Misses and Petites until the GSA turned up to bring me in to GenomeX.

Strangely, at the time Adam found me, that was what I actually wanted, even though it was killing me inside.

"But if you have
what it takes
to return to where
all the world
knows your name...

Then que sera,
let's go sailing on...
There's a wise man
in every fool..."

Now, though, I couldn't imagine not being here, with my surrogate family. And with her...

She had so much faith in me, even when I had no faith in myself, that I couldn't help but believe that Adam was right when he said I had the strength to be a hero. I doubt I'll ever know why it was *her* opinion that mattered so much, but love is just funny that way...

"I say come back -
come in from the cold,
into the warm.
I feel like fire,
guiding you back home
as darkness falls...

I say come home -
leave it all behind
and settle down...
I feel my love
can give me what I want,
for all time..."

I'm singing on auto-pilot now, drifting drowsily on the waves of simple happiness moments like these always seem to bring.

I don't even realize I'm projecting until Shal's purr intensifies at the altered chorus, but I'm not surprised, since it always calls up such a strong image of being here like this with her.

"So que sera,
let's go sailing on...
There's a wise man
in every fool...

I say come back -
come in from the cold,
into the warm.
I feel like fire,
guiding you back home
as darkness falls..."

Then Shal's purr ends as abruptly as it started, and I smile as I realize she's drifted off to sleep.

I continue singing softly to myself until sleep claims me too, the last lines of the song an acknowledgement of my gratitude for everything I have...

"I say come home -
leave it all behind
and settle down...
I feel my love
can give me what I want,
for all time...

For all time...

I feel like fire..."

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